Monday, November 24, 2008

You think ONE is great?!

The graphic above is a scan of an IBM ad circa 1952.  The copy explains that the IBM computer is so efficient and powerful, "it's like having 150 EXTRA engineers" available on call to save the day. 

Ah, yes.  150 floating heads, 300 disembodied hands and enough Anal-Retention to count the number of grains of sand in Florida.

Actually, this is a darned effective ad and definitely a product of the Marketing Department.  Believe me, there's nothing more horrifying to a Marketing person than a wonk who can't stir coffee without trial, error and a resultant system and process. 

The day 150 of them were replaced by a box that could be jammed into a dark closet had to be huge.  "Le'me do that ad, le'me do that ad, le'me do that ad, pleeeeeeaaasseee???!"


For your engineering pleasure, here's a list of common Engineer rejoinders, by discipline:

Chemical engineer:  "You're doing it wrong, and I'd tell you but you wouldn't understand."

Electrical engineer: "Do what you want, but don't blame me if you die."

Nuclear engineer: "If you don't stop, we could all be dead. Theoretically. And I think I'm right about that. At least that's what we currently believe.  Unless it changes."

Software engineer: "(Sigh)...just let me do it."

Mechanical engineer:  "Go ahead.  I'll watch and laugh while you screw it up."

Geological engineer: "Hey!  You could at least ASK me!"

Systems engineer:  "You're doing it way too much!  Simplify! Simplify!"

Bio engineer:  "What you're doing is a process.  We have no idea what will happen.  I will take it from here and ask for help when it gets out of control."

Genetic engineer:  "Some day, none of us will have to do that any more, you know."

Civil engineer: "If you get the pizza, we'll get the beer!"


NOTE TO ENGINEERS:  This is a good natured poke.  It's just a joke.  Funny - you know?  Like when HR people talk about helping their kids with their upcoming science project.  Or like when George Lucas keeps putting sound effects in an outer space environment.  Elsewhere in society, teasing people that are "liked" is relatively common.  This is one of those instances.  It's appropriate to laugh. Here.

All that being stated, Marketing people know they're functionally useless until people like you give us something to do with our "talents."  

Note:  A sadvertising reader has noted that all the engineers are clean shaven white guys with male pattern baldness (MPB).  Yikes.

Another note: The photo below was provided by a sadvertising reader who is, in fact, an engineer. He wishes to let the world know that Engineers can be colorful, courageous and color blind. He sends his well wishes to engineer brothers everywhere.

Another note:  A sadvertising reader - and also an ENGINEER, stated that he'd rather have 150 'talking heads' than a 'gray box' any day as the human mind is a better computer than...a computer.