Sunday, December 03, 2006

Interior Design for the obsessive compulsive.

The picture above is from an 2.5qt. jug of Dial® hand soap.

Three things of note -

1. There's 25% more Dial® antibacterial goo in THIS jug than the 64oz jug, but the Dial® people aren't charging you for it. (Thanks!)

2. If you look at the bottom lower right hand corner, you can read that this jug is a refill container and not a dispenser. Good! Can you imagine how awkward this 4lb'er would be sitting next to the sink? Can't you see some little kid, teetering on a stepstool, trying to dispense their dollop of germ killer while balancing this behemoth? I can - then I hear the dull thud of 40lbs of flesh hitting the floor, the requisite 2 seconds of silence, then the rising crescendo of "wwwaaaaAAAAAHHHHH!!!"

So far, I'm flying wing to wing with the Dial® people, 100%.

3. The hand soap is "Antibacterial Decor" hand soap.

Gotta' tell ya, this "Antibacterial Decor" stuff stopped me dead in my kitchen. What on earth is "Antibacterial Decor"?

Our house isn't decorated in Antibacterial Decor. It's not ANY decor other than breakfast debris, stuff the 1yr old has pulled off/around and "kid friendly" furniture. And having just had the carpet vacuumed because our oldest puked Black Cherry Jello onto it, a case could be made that our flu-ridden house was decorated in VIRUS.

What would "Antibacterial Decor" look like, anyway? I can see a lot of white...a lot of enamel...a lot of chrome and stainless steel. Basically, a Dentist's office. There is no way I'm decorating my home like a dentist's office. But, I'm wrong about that anyway because the Dial® people have provided a clue as to what "Antibacterial Decor" looks like - it's floral. I guess when you think of "Antibacterial", think "flowers."

The marriage of floral and antibacterial stands to reason. It's hard to imagine those paragon's of clean - mothers - charging their children, "Stop playing with those filthy flowers!" or "As soon as you get done playing in those flowers, wash your hands. With soap!" Moms like flowers. Moms plant flowers. Moms covet flowers. Flowers = Spring and Spring = Spring Cleaning and Cleaning = destroying bacteria.

Interestingly, however, there's a bug on that sunflower - look closely at the 9 O'clock position. That little spot is actually an insect. It didn't come through on the scan, but I went out to the kitchen to have a close-up inspection of the container and indeed, it's a bug. And every mother knows that where there's bugs, there's bacteria.

And where there's bacteria, there's Dial® Antibacterial Decor soap to kill them.