Sunday, May 11, 2008

Next, they'll be asking for hummus and tofu.



The above ad was found in our Sunday paper. It's for a pet food called "Goodlife Recipe." The product's slogan appears to be, "Thoughtful recipes made just for them. It's that simple."

WHAT?!

Thoughtful?! ...just for them?!

Put the bongs down and step away from the smoke...CATS. NEVER. FANTASIZE. ABOUT. CARROTS.

Nor do they think "Gawd I'd love a big ole'tomato!"

Same with peas in the pod.

Spinach too.

I'll give them the sushi and milk.

BUT PASTA?!

Sweet jiminy on a stick - who's the THOUGHTFUL person thinking up these "just for them" recipes? Obviously, they've never seen real cats (notice the fangs!?). Cats are carnivorous predators. When I was a kid, I had a cat that caught, killed, gutted and gorged on a rabbit. It was disgusting as all get-out, but that cat was prouder than a pious mom on first-communion day.

Last I knew, if a cat's out eating vegetation it's just before they cough up parasites, hairballs or plain old keel over.

OH! Wait - down there on the lower left - the coupon's fine print: "Wholesome delights or treats for Indoor Cats."

Oh. Ok. Now I get it. Goodlife is for pale, whiny latch-key cats who get their toys taken away by mice.

Dogs on the other hand...I once had a dog that ate a shoe. And it didn't even puke.



UPDATE: Heard from a Sadvertising reader who claims her cat will eat Lima Beans, Potatoes and Corn (that's dropped onto the floor). I think her cat's crazy and I stand on my assertion that cats don't care about carrots.